I had no intention of posting about the 2009 Rose Bowl… I caught only bits and pieces of it live and it’s not like you can say anything interesting about USC kicking the crap out of another Big-10 team. But after getting an e-mail yesterday from a friend who was distressed by ABC’s coverage of USC and the Trojans’ ridiculous act after every big play, I re-watched the game (had it on TiVo) and had the following observations:
- USC can’t get enough of itself. You already had players dancing in unison on the sidelines (think Backstreet Boys but gayer) after USC was up only 17-7. At 24-7, USC players (and a coach; more on that below) were on the field jumping up and down in a circle. I was going to catalog most of the incidents of Trojan player acting like a moron but I’d be stuck here writing until tomorrow. But if other programs (e.g. the University of Miami) acted like this, especially in a BCS bowl game, the media would be killing them.
- It all starts at the top. Herbstreit and Musburger (like everyone else in the media) were all over Pete Carroll’s jock on Thursday (did you hear Herbstreit’s Pete Carroll/USC = Tiger Woods comparison?), talking about how “Pete Carroll just likes to have fun”, etc. But the reason why his players act like such imbeciles is because Carroll acts the same fucking way. Right before halftime, a Penn State player fumbled and a USC player recovered the ball and gave it to Pete Carroll. And what did Pete Carroll do with the ball? Grabbed it, started yelling like a jackass and raised his new game-ball above his head. And isn’t there some sort of rule against coaches running onto the middle of the field and dry-humping his players during the game? At least we now know why Carson Palmer and Matt Leinart stayed for 4 years: THEY COULDN’T GET ENOUGH OF COACH CARROLL’S HUGS! Reggie Bush got the hell out of there early because he doesn’t roll like that.
- ABC likes USC almost as much as USC player likes USC. Right before halftime, USC scored again to go up 31-7. After a slow motion shot of Pete Carroll raising his arms in celebration (one of about 80 such shots throughout the telecast), Brent Musburger gushed about “how comfortable Carroll is about how he runs the operation” because he didn’t tell offensive coordinator Steve Sarkisian to “pack his bags, go up to Seattle, leave now” after accepting the UW Huskies coaching job; he actually let him coach in the Rose Bowl. You mean like what happens all the time when teams make bowl games and their assistant coaches stay on-board for the final game even though they’d already accepted a head coaching position elsewhere next season? Coach Carroll doesn’t want to switch offensive coordinators right before the Rose Bowl? WOW, what a great guy! This went on ALL game long. It was unbearable.
- USC really shouldn’t act like that while beating up on Penn State. Okay I know, it was a big game; it was the Rose Bowl, after all. But who cares? The only reason the Big-10 gets a team slaughtered at the Rose Bowl every year is because of that stupid automatic bid. If we can’t take away their bid, can we at least do something like have the Big-10 teams play about half a season, then put together an all-star team and start preparing for the Rose Bowl? Anyway, USC celebrating like they did against the Nittany Lions would be like if I were volunteering for the Special Olympics’ basketball program and I swatted some retarded kid’s shot, then proceeded to get in the kid’s face and tell him about it before chest bumping all of my teammates… twice. And yes, Big-10 football, an analogy comparing you guys to retarded kids is accurate and a little bit mean to the less fortunate.
USC fan needs to go away. Again. I grew up in the Los Angeles area and in my 18+ years growing up there (I left in 1995), I almost never encountered USC fan. Sure, you’d see the occasional license plate frame or t-shirt… after all, it is a major university in the area. However, in my visits back home over the past 5 years or so, these idiots are everywhere, and I mean everywhere. Lakers and Dodgers fans were always still relatively easy to find during down years, but SC fan was invisible. Now as I watch a USC game, I find myself asking questions like “damn, some guy from fucking ‘Scrubs’ is a Trojans fan?” and “Fez from ‘That 70’s Show’ went to SC?” And judging from what I saw of USC fan on Thursday (and every other day, for that matter), Wilmer Valderrama is probably one of the least douchey of the bunch, and that’s saying a lot. There are a lot of things I miss about So. Cal.; witnessing the out-of-control proliferation of these obnoxious wretches isn’t one of them.
Anyway, you may have seen the clip of Trojans’ LB Rey Maualuga dancing behind Erin Andrews like he was going to hit it from the back. For those of you who haven’t, here it is:
Also for your viewing pleasure, some dumbass Trojans players who don’t know who Joe Biden is:
And I thought these guys were at SC for the academics! Yeah, I know… O.J. Simpson wasn’t a Rhodes Scholar either.
January 5th, 2009 at 11:34 pm
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